January 1, 2011

Happy New Year! So the privacy thing isn't really in effect yet. I simply don't have the commitment level to go thru and find everyone's emails and invite them. So edit myself I shall, well, sort of.

We had a wonderful Christmas. This year I thought I'd actually, really simplify. I took out those traditions that seem to create stress for me. The point was to feel the true meaning of Christmas more intently. That is not what happened. All I did was simplify the sacrifice out of Christmas. In my attempt to feel joy, I canceled out the work. Which in effect, left out much of the joy.

We didn't make it to Temple Square. Yes, we have become, those Utah mormons. The ones that take it for granted. to be fair, I did get very sick. I'm thinking influenza, but couldn't get out of bed to get to the Dr, so there is no confirmation of that. I made it to Christmas Eve and then collapsed. Didn't resurface for several days. So I am cutting myself some slack on that one. I also didn't bake. That one killed me. I couldn't stand, but I missed out so much on the feeling of baking for my friends and neighbors. I thought of all those around me and my children, whose influence I appreciate so much. How much I want them to know they are thought of. Again, I realize, none of them noticed. But I did, I missed the doing it for them. Does that make sense?

We also have a tradition of a Nativity Family, which I have talked about here before. Didn't do that this year. Figured it was one of those "extras" we didn't need to stress about. Turns out, thinking of and praying for another family isn't stress at all. Taking the time to collect my family together and drop off a different piece of the Nativity to someone in need isn't work. It is the joy of Christmas.

In my attempts to focus on the true Spirit of Christmas, I left out Christ. I did read the four Gospels and focused on Christ, but without the doing, it has no meaning.

Next year I will welcome the stress and the business and I will drink it all in.